The wheels have well and truly fallen off this week! My eldest daughter Anna-Jayne received her 2nd and official diagnosis for Aspergers on Friday. It has brought mixed emotions to the fore.
Guilt for what I may have done wrong in my ignorance, subsequently making things more difficult for her, sadness that she's never going to 'grow out of it' and she will always struggle with certain things in life, anger that I am the only one who deals with this on a day-to-day basis and relief that I have some answers and can now get on with finding ways to help Jaynie sort through things and help her be the best person she can possibly be.
On mentioning to friends and family, I have dealt with a lot of disbelief and questioning with her being 'labelled', resulting in me personally being unsure and questioning the lady doing her assessment. She said in her professional opinion, Jaynie is very 'subtle'. She doesn't believe there is 'mild' Aspergers - Autism, yes absolutely - but not Aspergers. You either have it or you don't. She said Anna-Jayne definitely has it, but because of her being a) female, b) intelligent and c) lovely natured, she presents very 'subtly' and has learnt to 'copy' certain behaviours to help her cope and 'fit in' to a certain degree. All of this is very new to me and I am relaying the conversation as it was said to me so it is confusing?!
We have a long road ahead. But I am actually looking forward to helping Jaynie understand herself and enable her to use her wonderful positive attributes in new ways. I am going to update on here too so hopefully we can look back & see the progress we made and who knows, perhaps help and connect with other families in similar situations?
I made a wholly home-made gift on the weekend for my god-daughter but forgot to photograph it! Oops! I will come back tomorrow to share the links I used for lovely hair clips, headbands, gift basket & pencil roll.
*sorry about how difficult this is to read - blogger is being a poo & ignoring my formatting*